Sunday, 17 July 2011

rehab time in essexs.

This has proven to be a long sequence of bad event for me, i am to blame for most of it and some not. If only i had more time to flatten things out and redeem myself but chances are always slim. So glad to come back home and have my grandparents try and help me out. Which makes me feel even worse as i know it's hard for them. I do wonder why i write this in my blog but i don't know, helps in a way. I don't particularly care who reads it or if you want to.
Got the most ridiculous letter from uni, saying i couldn't go into second year as i hadn't summit some work which i had. From five nights of night shifts i wake up to that, was horrific. Hopefully i have sorted it out as i did actually summit that work. Also i've pushed away someone special, my fault. Maybe for the best who knows, but at a time so low i regret it all how i acted and issues i have. Previous bad experiences with people has thrown me off so much, i probably should of let it in and stopped being a dick.
But oh well, fresh start. Feel like i've been denying myself all the opportunities in being more successful, not giving myself the best start. Also realising if i want to be a successful illustrator i really need to put my foot down and work hard. I used to be obsessed around work and sort of been mislead by trying to sort myself out, and not really getting anywhere.

This is Jayson, i decided to draw him.
Things are taking a right turn, i prefer this way. 

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